Apr. 18th, 2017

marchionessofmustache: (Default)
So, I was waiting til I finished the tutorial part of the website to launch it, but I'm starting to think maybe I should start with just a Play Diary website? It sounds horrible but I don't know if I could manage updating both play diaries and tutorials regularly, and I'm already losing a lot of motivation because the idea is overwhelming.

Plus the tutorial site would still start with just like... one little thing which is like... not really substantial anyway? Like, I've only written the first project's lessons, which is pretty basic. The idea was to launch with that and continue adding a new lesson weekly but like...

I know it is ridiculous but writing a lesson and writing a play diary in one week seems like a lot of work even though it's like extremely minimal work?? It's not that the actual WORK is a lot of work, it's that I already realize that I have to find times when I'm not having problems with anxiety or depression or sensory shit and I have to be alone and etc etc plus switching focus is almost impossible for me so if I feel like doing play diary but need to work on tutorial or the other way around I will like... just get overwhelmed and do nothing lol.

Like, I know it sounds stupid and it's like "ok but sometimes you have to do stuff you don't want to do" or whatever but believe me it's NOT THAT LOL. I'm not just being finicky or lazy like my brain literally will fight with me and make me increasingly ill if I try to force myself to switch focus or force focus on something it's not already focusing on. And I seem to have little control over when these focus shifts happen, though trying to force new ones usually makes them ALL collapse and then I just focus on like... being depressed for a while???

But yeah IDK I think I might just finish up the play diary site as it is and launch it, and then start adding new content to it. Maybe I can even continue doing several diaries and wait and do the tutorial thing later...?

I found this like 'coffee' crowdfunding site (I forget the name but it's like a weird spelling of coffee lol) where you basically just accept $3 donations called "coffees" and you can like set goals and stuff on it? It seems better than a donate button and less intimidating than a Patreon to a potential donor, so I might try that out once I get the site up.

I keep thinking about it so I think I'll probably end up doing it, but I still want to do the "every NES game ever" play diary lol. Maybe once I get the site up and running and finally edit the Innocent Life diary and get caught up editing unsaga (since there's a lot more now), I'll start it???

But uh IDK.

The main reason I didn't want to launch the website w/o the tutorial thing is because hosting costs money, and it was going to be like... two separate subsites hosted on the same server, and I figured it would be better to like... already have both in existence when I pay for hosting since it will be a substantial amount of money for me (and probably cut like... a couple months off of my "this is where you run out of food" time limit) and I was hoping to do a little minor monetization with the sites, but uh...

I'm really terrible at promoting myself already, and I don't really have anywhere to promote the tutorial site?? I mean, I have accounts at a few game dev forums and stuff like that but like... I'm not going to just go make a topic like HEY GUYS GO TO MY SITE AND PAY FOR IT ALSO SORRY FOR NOT PARTICIPATING HERE FOR YEARS LOL

But I'm more likely to "promote" my play diary site because I'm active on game forums and stuff and constantly talk about it anyway? So I can just mention it and I won't feel like I'm like... imposing. IDK LOLLLLL;;;;

But I also was thinking, that if I can get the PD site up and running well enough, and finish Dens's coloring book thing, I could get back to working on Rogue Nightmare, and I feel like having a bigger game like that published will give me more credibility and attention for a game dev tutorial site anyway??????

And then I can use the web hosting to host a devblog for the game and stuff.

IDK like honestly this seems like a WAY BETTER PLAN since like the chance of me successfully monetizing either of these things is like pretty low and like that's not really the reason I'm doing it (monetization is more just like... a life necessity LOL because I'll need to make up for the cost of hosting somehow) but I just hate changing plans even if the new plan is easier and better??? Like it just feels 'wrong' and like... makes me feel like I shouldn't do anything at all.

Why... is my brain like this...????

Anyway, opinions/reassurance/something? Is putting off the site for probably a very long time just for the sake of having a small part of the tutorial launch alongside it worth it? You have to keep in mind that I may not be able to continue to afford hosting, so there's a chance if I don't launch the tutorial site, I may never get to launch it.

But I guess if I keep holding off, I just will end up spending all money on food and have $0 total so... nothing will launch XD I mean that's like quite a way away -- I have enough money to eat until 2018 at least. How far into 2018 I can go, though, I'm not sure yet. But there's a lot of time before then so anything can happen. Maybe I'll become functional enough to do Real People work or something soon?

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