Mustache Double Teaming

This is going to be a short entry this time, as there aren't a lot of screenshots left to make a post with before I get more from the Vita and upload more, but I want to get this little substory out of the way now, because I'll likely forget about it by the next time I upload caps, and I really want to make sure it's included.

Because this time, we get TWO mustaches for the price of one!

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Since this entry was a bit shorter, I'll kinda blather about some various thoughts.

Firstly, I want to say that when I first saw previews of this game, even though I was excited for a new SaGa game, I was feeling really iffy about it. The whole "no dungeons" thing was really... unappealing at first, and the character models and stuff were kinda ugly (I still think they're kinda ugly, but I get used to graphics easily so now I don't really think of it much), and the load times looked ridiculous... it just overall looked more like a glorified mobile game or something. The load times did improve since then but they're still kinda... longer than they should be.

But the game is extremely addictive and fun. There may not be dungeons, but the game is loaded with content. There's so much dialogue and options and little events all the time. There are times I feel like I've exhausted everything there is to do in an area, but more events happen later when I visit again! Just... the sheer amount of content in this game is pretty astounding on its own.

The battles are super addictive and fun. SaGa games have always been about intricate and strategic battle systems that focus on a 'nurture over nature' approach to character development. The battles take a LOT of thought and are very exciting and fun. I get super pumped in battles, and the difficulty is always pretty high. Even now when I say things go smoothly, I mean compared to before when I was scraping by with one character having like 2 HP at the end of a battle. Now I actually have more than half the party alive.

I realize I can't properly judge it since I haven't finished and it's still in the "COOL NEW GAME" stage for me, but I feel like this could easily become one of my favorite games in the series, and even one of my favorite games of all time. How well it holds up over multiple playthroughs is probably going to be a big determining factor there, though.

I'm also happy to see that the game is pretty well-received. It got a surprisingly high Famitsu score (higher than SaGa games tend to get, and way higher than a lot of people were expecting), and fan feedback seems largely positive. I haven't heard a single complaint on the GameFAQs board, though it's not like a ton of people are playing this game and discussing it there, since the game is only in Japanese. And a lot of people, myself included, were expressing doubts and pre-order regrets before the game came out.

Maybe part of it is that the early looks at the game gave us really low expectations, and the loads of content and fun and addictive systems really impressed us since we were expecting to be disappointed.

The game seems to have a decent following in Japan -- it seems to be doing better than UNLIMITED:Saga's release. There are a lot of people really enjoying the game on Pixiv and doing fanart, which is cool. Strangely, Urpina seems to be by far the least popular protag, when she was the first revealed and the most promoted. Personally I love Urpina from what I know of her, but I do think all the protags seem pretty cool.

I wouldn't exactly say I like Leo, but I like his scenario, and I love Liz. Leo is a bit dry. But Liz is a really fun character and she does more talking and interacting than Leo anyway. Leo just is kind of a "straightman" type or whatever to move things along when they need to.

Speaking of Liz and Leo, though, one thing I'm really not hoping for is for them to get together. I saw quite a bit of fanart shipping them and just... IDK, I don't like it. I mean, it's cool if other people want to ship them but... personally I think they make the coolest best friend duo. I think that their relationship is perfect how it is, and it doesn't need a romance at all. Plus the idea of a platonic relationship developing in a game like this is really cool. It's always the forced hetero romance and that's so boring anymore. I mean, I'm usually a sucker for it (I love every last Final Fantasy protag romance to death) but it will be so cool to see something new.

So I'm hoping a lot of this fanart is just fan shipping, and they don't canonically develop a romance by the end. I know there's been stuff with Liz acting "jealous" but I like to think it's more her acting protective?

If they do get together though, I won't be like... mad or sad or anything. Especially if it's done well, and the characters and writing seem pretty nice for a SaGa game so far.

And speaking of shipping I don't really have any ships in this game I guess? I mean, I platonic ship Liz and Leo like... hardcore. But I don't really think about much else. I kinda non-con shipped Rico > Marian for a bit, just because he was her captor, but I've come to think of Rico as probably a big softie who doesn't want to actually hurt anyone. I mean, Marian didn't really seem upset or anything when we rescued her; she was actually pretty happy as if she was enjoying herself in there. Maybe I should just consensually ship them XD

Maybe I'll ship like... Lewis x Lighthouses or something.

Anyway, I'll be super happy if Liz and Leo end up having a great friendship in the end with no hints of romance. That's like... my biggest wish for the game right now.

I'm also super excited to start a new game. Like... I don't want this one to end because I'm really enjoying it, and I don't want to miss out on stuff by rushing to finish it, but at the same time I feel so eager to start my second play. I won't try to rush though. I really do want to see as much as I can on my own this first time.

The Fish, The Witch, and the Weird Fire People

Our adventures now bring us back to Termina, where the protagonist Taria seems to live. I know this because there is a building called "Taria's Workshop" that I have yet to visit, and I want to see if maybe we can recruit her.

This is where we came before and saw Phoenix land near some mountains, and now some people are doing something with fire up there or something... but other than that we didn't do much here.

I also want to correct a mistake I made before -- in some earlier entry I said I had gone and "actually" gotten Lamar at that point and finished up the Cerenaif stuff at that point.

Well, that was wrong. This is where I actually did it, so Lamar hasn't been in the party until now actually. But now we officially do have Lamar, and he's already rocking hammers.

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The actual fish and witch and stuff...

I just realized last time I titled the last post fish/witch/fire people but then decided to split the fish/witch part into a separate post, so it probably sounds super weird now.

SO IT'S FISHY WITCHY TIME!

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There are so many hot old guys in Scarlet Grace I am having trouble deciding who to put in my party.

This is... the first time this has ever happened in an RPG...

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I was just playing Scarlet Grace and I like... ignored doing something in the game because I didn't want to do stuff out of order because it makes for bad play diary.

But I don't think I should be doing that... XD I mean, it's fine for games I've played tons of times before, but this is my first time playing the game and I want to just experience it how I experience it XD So I'll probably not do that in the future, play diary be damned. I've already written some messed up random entries because I was running all over the place in the game, so...

So much stuff has happened in this game. I feel like I've seen enough content to fill an entire game but I just keep discovering more and more stuff to do. This is the game they should have called "unlimited" hahaha.

Speaking of that game, though, Kurt's scenario is getting close to the end. I don't know if I'm going to keep going past the final story event and clear all the subadventures or whatever. I think I might just go to the end once I feel the party is good enough (I feel like they're pretty close anyway). But I should be able to finish it in a couple more play sessions. But probably longer, because I think I'm going to split the save file just before the final story progression event happens and go to the final boss from there, and then go back and go on and go to the final boss again... so I have to beat it twice lmao. But I want to show the difference in the story paths, because it's only the final adventure that is different.

Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment, with the psych. I am scared lol. I really shouldn't be, though. But you know, that's how it works. I don't know what they are going to want me to say and stuff. And I'm not good at saying stuff on my own. I'm not really good at answering questions in general. I guess this is a thing other people can do, but when people ask me "what do you think about..." or "how do you feel about..." I don't really understand what these questions mean. I don't know what kind of answer I'm supposed to be giving.

Like, it's not that I'm afraid to be honest or open it's that I literally can't understand the question. Like what does it mean to say what you "think about something" ?? I don't get it. I don't just have some kind of single thought about it? I mean, the amount of thoughts I could give it are theoretically infinite? What do you say? What kind of thought? Whenever I try to ask people though, they just get mad lol. It's even worse with how I "feel" because I usually feel nothing or it's just as endless and complex as how I "think" about it so...

But that's the kinds of things doctors ask you lmao.

I'm also afraid to like... bring up autism because my regular doctor like... dismissed it so quickly. It makes it intimidating. But the guy I'm seeing apparently works with autistic people, so... maybe he will be more understanding and helpful about it.

Also yesterday Dennis said he was worried he may have been coming down with a flu or something, because he had a headache and was feeling a bit nauseous. I said that I was feeling those things, too, but I figured it was just anxiety. He asked me why I was feeling anxious and I said "because I have an anxiety disorder." And after I said it I suddenly felt scared because I realized it was a thing that sounded sarcastic or smart-ass or whatever, even though it wasn't meant to be. It was just the answer to what I was asked. And I was really afraid he was going to get mad or whatever.

But he actually gave me a hug and asked what he could do. And I just kind of talked about it a little, even though talking doesn't really help, but more just to help him understand since he was willing to listen. And it was nice. Anxiety + relationship is surprisingly a difficult thing.

You would think that it would just be natural for people who love each other to just... accept these kinds of things and be helpful but. It's not so easy. It's hard for someone without a problem like this to really understand what it's like. And when people can't relate to stuff, they tend to feel like other people are wrong or making it up or something. Plus having anxiety all the time and being unable to do basic things like get out of bed or go to the grocery or have a conversation is really taxing on the other person. It messes with their day. It is frustrating and confusing. And that wears on people over time. It's easy for them to get frustrated, bottle it up for a while until they're really upset about it. They start holding it against you, thinking that you're being selfish.

It's not just Dennis -- this is how everyone reacts lol. I can't tell you how many times I've been told I was selfish or asked why I can't think of others because I was mentally incapable of doing something, beyond my control. And I already felt bad that I was letting other people down or inconveniencing others or whatever and having them blame me to my face only makes that worse.

But that is kind of just my life lolol.

Uh the main reason I said that though is because I really appreciate Dennis a lot because he really does try hard. And there have been times that he has made mistakes or gotten frustrated or I didn't communicate myself properly and I was upset with him about these things, and I tend to rant about that a lot, but I don't talk as much about how much I can really tell he tries a lot and really wants to be supportive.

Anyway I wrote myself an email called "why you are broken" lol. So I can look at it in the appointment and have things to say.

I guess I will write about it here in more detail, mostly to organize my thoughts, but if you want to know what my struggles are like, I guess you can read it XD

I'm not going to cover everything that was in the email, like I just made a list of physical symptoms like headache and stuff, but I don't think that's really something I need to work out thoughts on. I know what headache is.

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